Episode 7: Your DNA Doesn't Matter
Do you feel limited in life because of where you came from?
Today it’s my goal to help you realize that your DNA doesn’t define you.
Remember guys, I was the “dumb kid” that took developmental classes. I was the kid that had a rough childhood, that didn’t know who his real dad was.
But I am also the guy that runs a multi-million dollar company. So when I say - your DNA doesn’t matter - you can trust it!
So, let’s get into it.
What’s your Temperature?
I say that your DNA doesn’t matter, but in a lot of ways what I’m really sayin’ is everyone ends up somewhere, but very few end up there on purpose.
I was raised to believe I wasn’t allowed to have money even though no one ever actually told me that. It was something that I got in my head because of my surroundings.
I found that I only ever worked up to the level of those around me. Have you ever heard the saying “show me your friends and I'll show you your future”? One of my mentors, Ed Millet, said it in a way that clicked for me and I want to share it with you.
You all know we have a temperature that commonly runs around roughly 98 degrees. Let's imagine your temperature reading signifies your home life, your personal life, and your business life. Now let’s say I walk into a room of five of my buddies and they are all at 90 degrees.
But when I walk in, I’m at 70 degrees. In this situation, I am at the greatest risk of getting my temperature raised because I'm 20 degrees lower than everyone else.
Now, let's flip that. I’m at 90 degrees and I walk into a room of people with a temp in the 70’s. What’s gonna happen?
They’re all gonna suck the life outta me to raise their temperatures.
Comin’ from Nothin’
It don’t matter where you came from. I love hearing stories about successful people that came from nothin’. I heard a quote the other day that somethin’ like 80% of all millionaires in the last twenty years are from new money.
Meaning, they created it! It wasn’t handed to ‘em.
I also heard when a business gets handed over to the second generation, the rate of failure goes up astronomically and even so much more at the third generation.
And I get it. It’s not theirs, they didn’t create it. Maybe it’s not even their calling.
Lettin’ the Zoo Explain It
Now I'm gonna take you to the zoo to explain this even further for you.
Have you ever been to the zoo or maybe a circus and seen those gigantic elephants standing there with a rope around their foot, tied to a little bitty peg in the ground?
Those elephants could easily pull that peg out of the ground and go wherever they please. But why don’t they? They don’t because they have been tied up this way ever since they were a little baby, when they weren’t strong enough to pull the peg from the ground.
Since they grew up knowing that when the rope is around their foot they can’t leave - they believe it their whole life.
The fact that an adult elephant could easily pull the peg from the ground doesn't matter. In their head, they believe they are tied down.
What is tying you down?
What is the rope around your foot?
And is it really keeping you in place, or have you just been taught to believe it is?
Now let’s switch to a different zoo animal. I want to tell you a story about some monkeys and a ladder. So in this story, these people took 10 monkeys and put them in a room with a ladder. At the top of the ladder was a large bushel of bananas. Anytime that a monkey would attempt to climb the ladder they would get sprayed with water until none of the monkeys attempted to climb the ladder.
Next the people only left one of the monkeys that experienced the water in the room and brought in nine new monkeys. What do you think happened?
Anytime one of the new monkeys would attempt to climb the ladder, the one monkey that experienced the water would yell and yank the other monkeys off of the ladder.
It’s Up to You
Now when it comes to my monkey story, some would say that the monkey is just tryin’ to be a good guy. And maybe he is.
But how often in business, or anytime for that matter, do you attempt to start something new and someone close to you says “I wouldn't do that?”
That second group of monkeys wasn’t bein’ shot with the water. They could have reached the bananas but they allowed the monkey that had the negative experience to keep them from tryin’.
You have to decide if something that you take on is going to either help you or hurt you, regardless of the opinions of those around you.
Are they Helpin’ or Hurtin’?
I read this book one time called “The Like Switch” and it is about this FBI agent that followed around this Russian spy. For months he never said anything to him but his ultimate goal was to gain his trust.
He explains that the way you get someone to trust you is through proximity, duration, and frequency.
Proximity meaning, just being around them. And once he gained proximity, he would slowly increase his duration - the amount of time he would be around. And finally, he would increase his frequency - how often he came around.
Now let me ask ya’ this. How many people do you trust and allow to guide your life because of their proximity, duration, and frequency to you?
One of the biggest shocks I had, when I started all of this, was how many people turned on me. Both family and friends. But it was okay because I knew that this was the path I needed to be on.
On this path, I learned new things, stretched myself, grew myself, and found new friends, teammates, networks, and employees.
But it wasn’t easy. One of the hardest things I ever had to do was cut people from my life. Sometimes you have to take inventory on whether they were helpin’ or hurtin’.
If you walked into a room and had to take a hard look at yourself, what would your “temperature” be? I want you to write it down and let me know what it is by tagging us on social media @kosmounfiltered.
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